My Stag Party



My Stag Party

Up front I can say my mind had entertained some negative thoughts about my upcoming marriage. I don’t know. My intended was a wonderful person, pretty, with humility and a great heart. And, I do love her. It’s just, and, yeah, I know you’ve heard all this, I was not ‘in love’ with her.

So, there I was, arriving at my own stag party…

AND, there she was!

Can’t say I fought the urges. Sure, some bells and whistles went off in that part of the brain that made the gonads rage and titillate with visions of a hot experience, that part of the brain which weighs the duality of purpose – ‘do this’ and ‘don’t do this’.

She was all long blonde hair, blue eyes, quality-measured boobs, and the rest of the body just downright ‘Playboy’ curvaceous and tantalizing, every square inch designed for exploration. Strangely, it was her face that captured most of my attention, eyes that spoke only to me, lips that opened and closed in a way that dangerously increased my heart rate and brought me to critical mass.

It was a stag party! A stag party for me! Arranged by my office buddies at a swanky bistro on Fifth Avenue. After two highballs she appeared in a knockout gold and lavender dress and every move she made caught me holding my breath and swallowing hard. We were introduced. I stared, fumbled for words. My God! If this was my reaction to every beautiful lady I saw, why was I getting married on Saturday?

The staggering notion struck me that this lady, Kristin, really liked me, not because she was play-acting for my stag show, but, genuinely liked me. We talked and drank, and my mind absorbed the guilt-trips. The desire for her was in the ‘overwhelming’ range! All I could imagine at the moment was a long lifetime on a sandy beach of Maui.

Our patter was awkward, clumsy, with each of us somewhat humbled by the magnetism that seemed to draw us together.

“You’re in the brokerage business, Ricky?” She asked.

“Yes,” I answered with a silly smile, “and you?”

“I’m a legal secretary with Brooks and Mason,” she looked shyly into her Margarita.

“Are you married, Kristin?” Somehow, it was important that I knew.

“No… I was married briefly one year ago…” She smiled sadly and sipped her drink.

“What happened?”

“Jerry was killed in Afghanistan… You remind me of him. I came tonight at the request of one of your friends. I’m beginning to believe I should not have come.”

Kristin excused herself and went to the Ladies Room.

Alone at the small bar table, my friends in a corner playing Liar’s Poker, I felt suddenly very alone and very vexed by the evening’s complexity. The girl I was to marry Saturday was not at all on my mind…only Kristin.

I really didn’t know if Kristin was coming back to the table, or, leaving the party altogether, just making the ‘ladies room’ a departure excuse. All I knew was that I would wait until closing time to see if she would.

Then, there she was, walking back to the table. My heart did two full somersaults and a half-gainer into the deep end of my soul with feelings never felt in this life-time. Hey, it’s just something I knew! What else can I say?

She sat and spoke. “Ricky, I was going to walk out of here, but something made me stay…it’s hard to explain. This is your stag party, and I’m making a complete and utter fool out of myself.” Her lovely eyes got all watery as tears were forming.

“If you had not come back I would have spent an eternity looking for you… Look, I know this is all crazy and sudden but our hearts are telling us something…”

I called off the wedding.

Kirstin and I married six months later and honeymooned in Maui.

‘Flash Fiction’ by Billy Ray Chitwood – September 12, 2015


Promo time for “Butterflies and Jellybeans,” a compelling love story with some tense moments. Two joggers meet on a running path during a thunderstorm – in a most unusual way. The lady jogger is struck by lightning. With the lightning strike comes love, but not without some suspense…a matriarch’s great secret, a brother’s deceit and gambling habits. It will take a murder, love, and a long desert odyssey before…well, before love conquers all.



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8 thoughts on “My Stag Party

    1. The bride to be (or, not to be), strange as it seems, was having her own party: she fell in love with the guy that came out of the cake! They married, honeymooned in Maui, ran into Ricky and Kristin, bought a house in Connecticut which just happened to be next door to – you guessed it

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Sorry, Jill, my hasty fingers fouled up the computer… Before I rudely interrupted myself… The bride to be fell in love with the guy that jumped out of the cake at her bachelorette party. They honeymooned in Maui, met up with Ricky and Kristin, became great friends, and now live next door to each other in Connecticut… 🙂 I also thirteen number 1 best sellers! Yuck, yuck

        Liked by 1 person

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