Acceptance

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Acceptance

I was taken from disturbed darkness

 Out into the frantic light of life,

Taken from the safety of the womb

 And an often dark and jarring strife.

*

The humble journey I began came

with incipient turmoil and doubt,   

subtle remorse and terrible guilt

That, with me, I carried about.

*

With youth behind I wore my badges

Of courage, deceit, and self-doubt.

Tasting the beguiling fruits of Eden

And sipping from the Bacchus spout.

*

My Odyssey was not without the

Pain of guilt and sincere remorse.

Oh, no! My mind’s black closet

Choked and stifled me in due course.

*

Then came a forgotten Deity Who

Brought me to my misguided sense,

Gave me another chance at Faith,

And bade new Love to commence.

*

So, here, in the quietness of this

Meadow green, I vow to schemes

Of Worship those worthy paeans

Of Soul on these acres of dreams.

 

©Billy Ray Chitwood – April 18, 2017

 

Please visit my Website, preview my books of mystery, suspense, thriller, romance, history, memoir, read some book reviews and comments by the author. https://billyraychitwood.com

 

Please follow me on https://twitter.com/brchitwood

The Sea and Me

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The Sea and Me

Some people are born to fret and worry… Yes, even here in this magnificent resort on the Sea of Cortez in Mexico.

So, what’s the rub?

The scene above was there each morning when I awakened – the cobalt waters, the pale blue skies, the palm trees, the villas below our penthouse, the cobblestone roads that ran through the property, and the nostalgic aromas of old Mexico. Julie Anne and I walked many days on the concha-laden sandy beach and gathered seashells. We watched the young lovers in languid repose on the beach and by the pools. We watched the multi-colored sailboats on the sea and the larger yachts farther out toward the horizon. We watched the banana boats take the squealing tourists on a bouncy ride through the waves, some falling off and gathered back by the gleeful BB operator. Single-engine hang-gliders went aloft with one or two people, dipping low, soaring up again, near the beach and the resort. Most of these happy scenes played out with the background sounds of mariachi music playing on someone’s sound equipment…

Okay, Okay! I got lost in the moments of memory.

The rub?

It came time for an HOA election of board members. Julie Anne, a few Mexican staff members, and some of our American friends/Condo neighbors at the resort thought I should run and lend some support to solving the pesky problems facing the resort…and, NO, I won’t be elaborating on those pesky problems. The truth is, all I wanted to do was write my blogs and books in this most tantalizing environment. However, the prodding of wife and friends PLUS my own stupid ego finally won out, and I put my name in the proverbial hat.

I was elected to the board and subsequently appointed President of the HOA Board. Having never been on any kind of board in my life I tried to keep my enthusiasm and pride in check.

Now, back to that beautiful scene of our resort above – and the fact that some people were born to ‘fret and worry’. The F&W part was all mine, and that beautiful resort environment changed to problem solving – or, attempts at problem solving. AND, my writing went further south toward Puerto Vallarta and Acapulco, without me enjoying the journey…you all know that trying to please hundreds of people in one neat bundle is impossible.

Well, my board did solve problems, from an economic standpoint, and took care of many other issues, The credit goes to my great Secretary (who would ultimately become President), my good Treasurer, the resort staff, and the other fully engaged and supportive members of the board. I can say with honesty and honor that there were moments of warm camaraderie, frustration, and consistent efforts to solve those ‘pesky problems’.  

Eventually, I got back to ‘sea shells at the seashore’ and my writing…

Speaking of my writing (and you knew I would be bringing my writing into this post!) the final book 6 in my ‘Bailey Crane Mystery Series, books 1-6’, A COMMON EVIL, was loosely inspired by my sojourn at that beautiful Mexican resort… It is a thriller and there are truths therein – regarding the cartel business and some of the resort’s problems. There is murder! Suspense! It’s a Thriller! (Oops! I said that!)

You should read it and leave an Amazon review…the book has several 5-Star reviews, and, of course, I would be happy to see more (honest reviews, of course!). You can preview the other 5 books in my BC series at the Website (address below) and eight other titles that bear my name.

Please contact me if you wish to know more about the resort…it’s in the state of Sonora in Mexico, an easy drive from Phoenix and Tucson, Arizona.

 Billy Ray Chitwood – April 14, 2017

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 Please visit my Website at: http://billyraychitwood.com To preview all 6 of the ‘Bailey Crane Mysteries’ and other books inspired by true events. There are also some comments by me and some reviews of my books…even some recent blog posts.

Please follow me on twitter at: http://twitter.com/brchitwood

 

 

 

No Longer Relevant

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No Longer Relevant

            Like lonely grains of sand transported by harsh winds and randomly rearranged into symmetrical peaks and valleys, so Time transports the hours, days, months, and years of Man into the peaks and valleys of Memory, there to dwell in Irrelevance of purpose, waiting for his ultimate destiny, moving with the wind through the joy and tears of his yesterdays, wistfully waiting, ruminating on myriad and arcane Mysteries of death’s new birth – to darkness, to another dimension, to be again without knowing if He once was.

There is so much to wish undone, so much to have accomplished, so much to cherish in those places of your life, yet, it is not lost on so many of us the now lack of relevance to our existence – inabilities, pains of the body and mind, forgetfulness, anger and self-loathing. But, then, we have still the passion to live and see another week, month, year, and we have that loved one who is the enabler, the one who smiles and dreams on into the tomorrows of life, not cowed by Time’s relentless passing…the one who brings to you soothing words that chase away for a time the demons that diminish twilight joys.

For me, there is a dear wife who loves me and caters to my needs. AND, there is my writing which keeps a young man wandering around in my body and mind…helping me to create books and characters of worth – at least, that is my consensus. Writing does something else for me. It keeps my mind active, keeps me away from the doldrums of self-pity and reviewing the past. As I’ve said many times, I still find pieces of me in and between the lines of what I write.

Although there might be times when I’m a ‘grain of sand’, irrelevant in the scheme of things, I have my devoted wife, my kids, their kids, and my Writing that keeps me a fair distance from those peaks and valleys.

One last thing, the books I write are fun in the drafting, in the editing and rewrites, and, I’m told, they’re a lot of fun to read. Many of the books are inspired by true events – mysteries, suspense, romance, memoirs, et al (14 books in all). NOW, if I only knew how to market them well, they would likely be well read. It’s my hope you will try one…each book is previewed on my website, along with some author comments and some book reviews. Please, try one of my books, read and review it on Amazon…good or bad. Readers, reviews, of course, are the life blood of authors.

Really, you Readers out there! You could keep me Relevant for a long time to come.

            Billy Ray Chitwood – April 4, 2017

Please visit my website, preview my 14 books, author comments, and some book reviews:

         https://billyraychitwood.com

                   Please follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/brchitwood                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

 

 

 

 

Meet Lady Gray

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Meet ‘Lady Gray’

           Our beloved Bengal cat, George, left us for animal heaven some months back after a twelve-year love affair. It was a sad and traumatic moment for Julie and me…we buried George under some trees on our property, and, each morning, we look out the kitchen window at his burial spot and say, “Hello, George, we love you.”

          As though George’s spirit reminds us of our time together in some peculiar ways, he finally put an exclamation point on it all…

          Before George passed away, a small gray and white kitten came several times to our house and looked through the windows. It seemed obvious to us that the two transferred some mutual affection. George was a declawed, neutered house cat and could not go outside so the two enjoyed and passed their furry feelings via empty space.

          After George died, the gray and white kitten came often to our kitchen door. Julie gave her some turkey bits, steak leftovers, and, finally included on her shopping list some cat food and treats. Julie left each food serving just outside the door.

          At some point, with soft coaxing, the kitten timidly entered the house, but left after a brief stay. Julie and I had different views on the kitten. Julie was sure the kitten had a home nearby, and we could not just arbitrarily adopt the cat…plus, Julie was still at an emotional level over George and did not think she wanted another animal pet. I took an opposite view: I didn’t think the kitten had a nearby home and genuinely felt she wanted our home as her home. Of course, we both were likely right – maybe she had a home but was cast aside…and, there were stray cats around 

          As days and weeks passed, the kitten continued her daily visits, and, with each visit, lingered around our property, came into the house on occasion and stayed a bit longer each time before Julie put her outside. Julie was also worried about the kitten having fleas or other ailments, likely having been abandoned either by her previous owners or simply had survived in the wild.

          The young cat was accompanied on occasion by a larger black and white male cat. It was apparent that the gray and white female held dominance over the bigger male, not sharing her food with him, and giving us reason to believe the female was in season.

          Julie and I had e-mailed and called neighbors to find out if they knew to whom the kitten belonged. We got no helpful information. In the meantime, there was concern that we were feeding ‘gray and white’ too much food because the cat was developing quite a girth…and, sure, we considered the fact she could be in a gestation period.

          Finally, there came the day when ‘gray and white’ entered the house and did not want to leave. It was during this time that Julie and I came together in our decision to keep the lovely feline. Her personality was so lovingly tender and timid. We would open the door for her to leave, and she would back away. In short, we fell in love with the little critter…bloated tummy and all – we felt the big tummy could be from all the food Julie was feeding her.

          We are picking her up today at 1:00 PM from the Vet Hospital, where she has been spayed, wormed, and inoculated to boost immunity. The Vet tells us ‘Lady Gray’ is likely one-year old or thereabouts.

          Julie and I are excited about having this little beauty in our lives…

          We consider ‘Lady Gray’ a gift from God…

 

Billy Ray Chitwood – March 30, 2017

 

Please visit my Website, preview my 14 books, read some book reviews and author comments.

https://billyraychitwood.com

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So, Tis An Author You Wish To Be

So, Tis An Author You Wish To Be

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So, Tis An Author You Wish To Be!

So, tis an author

You wish to be!

And, why, I ask,

Do you come to me?

Because, I write so

Much, you say,

So many pretty lines

Throughout the day.

True, it is my passion;

It must be so for you.

                         Yet, with fervent zeal,                        

Words at times flow few,

Bringing fitful malaise,

Wasteful lingering doubt,

 A brain inactive and dull,

And depressing flameout.

I mean not to dampen

Your dream of writing

But there are few who

Will find it requiting.

Then, if you are like me

And write for the soul,

No matter the repulsive foe,

You have ultimate control.

©Billy Ray Chitwood – March 24, 2017

Please visit my Website, preview my 14 books, read some reviews and author comments:

https://billyraychitwood.com

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Finding New Love

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Finding New Love

(A Country Song)

         Okay, call me dumb. ‘loony tunes’. or something more demeaning, but I have this impulse to share with you a country song I wrote some years back.

         A dinner party was just winding down at our Arizona weekend mountain retreat, and we were feeling our oats. A dear friend of mine, Ray Morgan, gone now, but never to be forgotten, loved country music and could get teary eyed when some of our then contemporary C&W artists sung their sad ballads, a la Willie Nelson, Jim Reeves, Ernie Tubbs, and Hank Williams. Now, I loved country music but was more of a ‘My Way’ kind of guy, but this was Ray’s night…

        Because I don’t pick guitar anymore (never did really well), I once sang a song a cappella on YouTube and it just didn’t grab its essence without those strings strumming and a piano accompanying it. So, I’ll be sparing you the ‘gift’ of my voice on YT. When you read below the words to the song, just imagine that great C&W artist, Tim McGraw, picking and singing the words in that sensitive, unique, and soulful way he has that echoes memories from the past.

        Now, don’t be getting the idea that this is a great song, although I like it aplenty because it goes to the roots of country music – I think…

        If I’m lucky, some C&W artist will read the words to the song and want to record it. Well, I’ll surely make it easy for him or her. Just give me a jingle…he says with total lack of conviction.

         I’ve written a number of songs over the years, some I think pretty darn good. So, from time to time, I’ll post one or two or three or four… just saying!

*

Finding New Love

In the middle of a love song

I fell out of love with you –

Dancing ‘neath a star-bright sky

I found someone new.

She was everything I wanted –

She was every dream come true,

And she got my heart re-started –

She got me over you.

*

And now I’m happy again –

My heart is singing again.

Ah, yes, I’m happy again

‘Cause now I’m over you.

*

I remember our young love

I recall all the pain…

I remember every time we cried

Every time we tried –

I saw our young love die.

We were so new at love.

We had so much to give,

But all the pain we caused

Made it too tough to forgive…

So, I’m sorry for hurting you

And I know you’re sorry, too…

A part of me will always

Be a part of you.

But, tonight, this star-bright night,

I’ve found a new love,

A warm and a true love,

A love that won’t die.

*

In the middle of a love song

I fell out of love with you

While dancing ‘neath a star-bright sky

I found someone new.

She was everything I wanted,

She was every dream come true,

And she got my heart re-started –

She got me over you!

And, now, I’m happy again.

My heart is singing again.

Ah, yes, I’m happy again

‘Cause now I’m over you.

                             ©by Billy Ray Chitwood

         I totally realize that this post and song is self-serving to the extreme, but, really, what else is new? Aren’t we all just a teensy bit?

Billy Ray Chitwood – March 17, 2017

Hope you will stop by my Website, preview my 14 books, read some book reviews and author comments:

http://billyraychitwood.com

Please follow me on:

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