I’m Alone

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I’m Alone

With only my memories –

I sit alone on the hill and watch the sunset…

Faces float by in surreal silence

And,

In words only I can hear,

each tells a story of

My life, unadorned with gratuitous

Words of praise and solicitude…

With each face,

    With each story,

I know where I have failed and

Corrupted my own existence.

Where ‘could have been’ echoes

Through the lonely caverns

Of my soul.

I sit alone as the Sun hastens

The night and the demons

Of regret and remorse.

A Life so frivolously wasted

On Wanderlust and Longing.

So it must be that a life be lived

In such disarray no matter

The Cause…

For it is fodder for the

Fools to come.

Billy Ray Chitwood – April 29, 2016

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butterfly

My books tell the longer story – they can be found at http://www.goo.gl/nWMXm3

And these links:

http://www.about.me/brchitwood

http://amazon.com/author/billyraychitwood

http://twitter.com/brchitwood

http://goodreads.com/author/dashboard/billyraychitwood

http://facebook.com/billyray.chitwood

http://facebook.com/billyrayscorner 

http://linkedin.com

Proud member of: #ASMSG – #IAN – #AHA

Proud recipient of eleven Blog Award nominations.

 

 

 

Austin After Hours

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Austin After Hours

Guess I’ll never learn! I’m Shawn Finney, and this episode has all the makings of a super ‘Dream Evening’.

I’m a sucker for a sad song and dance, and this little lady knows exactly what she is doing, her body virtually melting into mine with serious and obvious endorsements – should you get my meaning. Perhaps I should put it this way: I was a bit embarrassed when the dance ended, and we returned to our seats.

I’m in Austin, Texas, one of my favorite cities in the whole world, calling on some Tech accounts. It’s close to 10:00 PM and I’m bone-tired, thinking maybe I’ll go to my spacious room, order a cheeseburger, fries, chocolate milk shake, get fat and watch a movie.

Thing is, I overthink the whole thing. Yeah, true, I want that cheeseburger, fries, and chocolate milk shake, but I’m just passing a busy lounge in the hotel, hearing the laughter, music, mixed with some soft feminine voices, and my old devalued brain thinks I’m likely missing something by going to bed so early.

Well, I no sooner get seated on a posh bar stool when this raven-haired beauty gets shoved into me by this big ole boy in a cowboy hat who is clumsily on his way to the Men’s Room – not drunk, just clumsy and full of apologies to me and the gorgeous lady.

When the cowboy passes, the lady and I make some eye contact and it’s my belief something warm and friendly is palpable between us. She is just getting back from the Ladies Room, heading for a corner booth where two other women sit with amused grins.

I end up in that corner booth with those three women, and as the fickle finger of fate would have it, they all worked at one of my Tech accounts. Raven hair’s name is Barbara, and the other two Joyce and Nancy. So, we have lots to talk about, except, truth be known, I’m thinking of how to cut this long-haired raven lovely out of the pack.

Into my second drink, the small combo start playing some late night soft song, and I notice Barbara glancing at the dance floor. I’m thinking that’s a signal for me to ask her to dance… I do and she accepts the invitation.

Now, the room has low lights, for which I’m thankful, and I can tell the world that if excitement in dancing is measured by groin grinding, racing heart-beat, muttered monosyllabic inanities, then I am one excited Tech Salesman about to blow body fuses.

Barbara’s two lady friends pause on their way out of the lounge. “You two have fun. We’re going to our rooms.” They smile and leave.

Now, I’m thinking… If the ladies work for the Tech Company here in Austin, why are they staying in the hotel? So, I ask Barbara.

“There’s a Tech Convention in town and the company wants some of us staying at the hotel to manage the hospitality suite for the VIPs.”

“My company didn’t make me aware of any convention and no one mentioned it today during my rounds.”

“Well,” Barbara concludes, “it’s off the radar. ‘Hush-Hush’ kind of stuff. Even I don’t know what transpires at the convention meetings, but I do know it’s a really big thing.”

Back at the corner booth, with another drink and the crowd thinning out, Barbara and I make it official that we are indeed connecting – body and hand touching, dreamy eyes, asking personal questions of each other.

No, neither of us is married. No, neither of us is going steady. Yes, there are relationships that lasted for a while.

“You’re too lovely, Barbara, not to be encumbered. Recent break-up?” I ask.

“Yes,” she answers, pauses for a moment, “Do you mind if I become rather blunt, Shawn?”

That question rings my bell. It’s loaded with expectations of the good kind and the bad kind. I figure it can’t hurt to be optimistic. “No, Barbara, I don’t mind – become rather blunt!”

I hope for the best!

“Well, I have a room here at the hotel, and you have a room here as well. Would you like to continue our ‘getting to know each other’ in your room or mine?”

After flip-flops of victorious surprise, I squeeze her hand and say, “Let’s use mine. It’s spacious and has a great view.” We both laugh, likely on the same wave length, ‘yeah, really’? Space and views are going to be up close and personal.

While Barbara wanders out of the lounge, I pay the fairly large tab – which will find its way on my next company expense account – and go in pursuit of Barbara.

Craziness!

I expect Barbara will be just outside the door of the lounge, but not so. I look around the large lobby and no Barbara. Maybe she needs the Ladies Room, so I go and stand a few yards away.

Finally, I open the Ladies Room door a crack and yell her name – several times.

No Barbara!

What the hell is going on? She has taken no money from me. She seems genuinely interested in me. What game is she playing? Is there something sinister at play? Nah, no way! Not in this classy place!

I wait and I wait.

Finally, peeved and let down, I go to my room on the 18th floor, fish in my pocket for a room entry card and cannot find it. I go back down to a virtually empty lobby, no sign of Barbara, get a new entry card and return to my room.

The door opens easily and I enter the semi-dark room. The city lights pour through the windows and provide clear outlines of the furniture and the mini-bar. I consider for a moment another drink…to placate my self-pity and mild depression. No, I will do no movie skit here! I’ll just put my disappointment to bed.

For a moment I plop on the large sofa and contemplate the evening. What a bummer! I mean, so beautiful all the way to the end, then a bummer!

I sigh deeply, lazily shed my clothes and leave all items in a heap on the sofa.

I enter the spacious bedroom and flip the light switch.

My eyes are ready to pop out of my head!

A purring voice says, “I thought you’d never get here!”

There on the bed, covers pulled down, her lovely long raven hair spilled across a king-sized pillow, her blue-green eyes soft and pleading fake forgiveness, her forefinger at the corner of her lush red lips, and her voluptuous body in a tantalizing position, was the missing Barbara.

I stand and look with wide eyes and a silly smile on my face.  A certain part of me is swelling with joy and pride.

I look idiotic as I do a swan dive onto the king-sized bed.

And, oh, yes, there was indeed a most delightful ending…

Flash Fiction by Billy Ray Chitwood – April 25, 2016

(I write blogs, fiction, non-fiction, memoirs – mystery, suspense, thrillers, romance… Take a peek at my thirteen books at http://www.goo.gl/nWMXm3

LINKS:

http://www.about.me/brchitwood

http://amazon.com/author/billyraychitwood

http://twitter.com/brchitwood

http://facebook.com/billyray.chitwood

http://facebook.com/billyrayscorner

http://goodreads.com/author/dashboard/billyraychitwood

http://linkedin.com

http://googleplus.com/billyraychitwood

Proud member of #ASMSG – #IAN – #AHA

Proud recipient of eleven + blog award nominations

The Open Book

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The Open Book

The professor placed his glasses on the open book, rose solemnly from the comfortable chair, and took the stairway to the roof level of the old building, circa 1900.

He walked slowly the seven floors to the top. The door to the roof was seldom opened, so he tugged with some effort to get it open, the scraping sounds echoing eerily down the stairwell.

He stepped through the door onto the gritty and stained rubberized roof flooring, his feet giving slightly on the softened surface.

He looked all around, knew he was the only person on the roof, and walked to the far NE corner and stood at the short wall barrier, looked and found some blocks away his brick home with its old iron fence and gates. Clara was there now with all the memories of the past forty years.

His face carried his sixty-nine years in craggy lines and sorrow, his three-day old whiskers a mix of gray and white.

His mind was in no hurry in presenting him with the pivotal points in his life…the summa cum laude graduation and notable milestone accomplishments from this very university upon which one of its many roofs he now stood…marriage to his lovely Clara, an awe-struck young lady who found it so easy to fall in love with him…the happy years of noted achievements and awards…the unhappy day when the doctor declared there could be no children because of his lack of fertility…all the happy days with Clara, their talks about  adoption, and their decisions to travel, see the world, enjoy their lives…the awful day when the doctor announced that Clara had stage 4 cancer.

The thoughts continued as he stood, hands in his pockets, staring at the only home he and Clara ever lived in. His six-foot frame began to tremble with his tears as last night came vividly to him.

He suddenly felt used up, all those moments that mattered were no longer there…

Then he heard the police sirens, saw the cars with flashing lights. The cars were stopping at his house those few blocks away…

They would be finding Clara at any moment now…he could not let her suffer any longer.

Then, he stepped up to the short wall, tears flooding his face, and jumped to his death on the hard earth below.

Flash Fiction by Billy Ray Chitwood

April 19, 2016

(I write fiction and non-fiction- mystery, suspense, thriller, romance, memoir… Please preview my 13 books at my website – http://www.goo.gl/nWMXm3

Or

my Amazon Author site.)

 LINKS:

http://www.goo.gl/nWMXm3 (website)

http://www.about.me/brchitwood

http://goodreads.com/author/dashboard/billyraychitwood

http://amazon.com/author/billyraychitwood

http://twitter.com/brchitwood

 http://facebook.com/billyray.chitwood

http://facebook.com/billyrayscorner

http://linkedin.com

http://googleplus.com/billyraychitwood

Proud member of #ASMSG – #IAN – #AHA

Proud recipient of eleven blog award nominations.

 

When a Leader…

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When a Leader…

When a leader denies the urges of greed and trappings of gold to do what is right for the nation he leads, the people will always win.

When a leader stands by what he/she knows to be morally right, when a soft compromise does not damage the true essence of a law, policy, and principle, the people will always win.

When a leader is given false data and acts on that data, yet later discovers the fallacies therein and declares an action void, the people will always win.

When a leader is charismatic and genuinely speaks from the heart without mutterings of doubt, the people will always win.

When a leader takes the complexity of an issue away so that all can understand, the people will always win.

When a leader protects by all means available against an enemy off our shores, with a sound entry and exit strategy, the people will always win.

When a leader provides jobs and a thriving economy, the people will always win.

When a leader can provide avenues of learning for the skills of many, the people will always win.

When a leader keeps the military components of his nation at the highest qualitative and quantitative numbers, the people will always win.

When a leader has Faith in a higher Intelligence, without bias for those of other legitimate Faiths, and shows that in his actions, the people will always win.

When a leader follows a script for governance and the rule of law, written in the blood of past generations, the people will always win.

When a leader and his team of leaders know when it is time to go and replace themselves with honorable men and women, the people will always win.

Billy Ray Chitwood – April 14, 2016

(I write blogs, books of non-fiction, and fiction – mystery, suspense, and romance)

LINKS:

http://www.goo.gl/nWMXm3 (Website, Bio, & Books)

http://www.about.me/brchitwood

http://twitter.com/brchitwood

http://facebook.com/billyray.chitwood

http://amazon.com/author/billyraychitwood

http://goodreads.com/author/dashboard/billyraychitwood

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Dreams Denied

 

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Phoenix, Arizona

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Amazon US – goo.gl/fMt82R

Amazon UK – goo.gl/HTQGo

Amazon Worldwide – http://authl.it/1sv

A book inspired by the

brutal murder of a young actress.

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Dreams Denied

A beautiful desert city – Phoenix, Arizona!

I fell in love with it the first time we met so many years ago, after a long drive from California.

Those were the days when I ran loose and let the world wait for me. There was some work but it was mostly play – enjoying film work, television commercials, even had a starring role in a stage play at the Phoenix Little Theater – The Pleasure of His Company… A real ‘hoot’, and it even got great reviews in both Phoenix newspapers.

My play time was often with some attorney buddies – cocktail hours, playing Liar’s Poker but for the most part, it was I chasing the pretty ladies. Ever so often one of those pretty ladies would come along and I would suspend my operational procedures…until our time was over… Okay, I was a very nice guy but a ‘lotus eater’ of the worst kind.

One of my attorney buddies had a lovely lady as their receptionist and secretary. She was also a very dear friend of mine and of some of the ladies I dated. And, she had been the one to get me into acting, TV commercials, and modeling. Carmen had her dreams of home and hearth, someone to love and with whom to grow old.

This is her story! The forensic details are all pretty much true, but I have fictionalized and imagined some events in the book.

By all accounts, Carmen spent her last night of life at dinner at a nice and well-known Phoenix restaurant with her boyfriend. After dinner it is supposed Carmen followed in her own car her boyfriend to his apartment.

That was basically what was known at the time.

Carmen lived with her mother and two children in an apartment complex across the street from an elementary school.

The morning after the dinner, Carmen’s car was found on the side of the road next to the elementary school, car doors open, and her purse in the front seat area.

Then, it would be many weeks before Carmen’s body was found in the northeast section of Phoenix by two rock hunters. She lay in an arroyo, ravaged by the summer heat and the denizens of the desert. It appeared the perp or perps stopped dragging her body across the desert floor every few paces to drop heavy rocks on her head…presumably making sure she was dead. So much of forensic value was lost with the passage of time and summer monsoons.

After all the years I decided to write a series of mysteries. The series is called the Bailey Crane Mystery Series – Books 1-6.

An Arizona Tragedy – A Bailey Crane Mystery – Book 1, is the first book in the series and it is about the awful tragedy that brutal murder created            .

Sitting here, writing this post, I want to tell you so much more… But, suffice, the book represents in some small way my closure. Of course, I hope you buy the book and meet Bailey Crane…yeah, he’s a lot like me.

Billy Ray Chitwood – April 7, 2016

Some Other Links:

http://www.goo.gl/nWMXm3 (Website)

amazon.com/author/billyraychitwood

http://about.me/brchitwood

http://twitter.com/brchitwood

http://facebook.com/billyray.chitwood

http://linkedin.com

Proud member of #asmsg – #IAN – #AHA

Proud recipient of eleven blog nominations.